How can one understand who they truly are if their head is full of “who they think they should be?” Perhaps its time to begin unwinding those beliefs (or old tapes) about yourself and revisiting them to see if “that” is who you really want to be right now. You may even find that “that” is someone you never really were and sincerely never wanted to be. You just became “that” because it seemed like the right thing to do. Or maybe you became “that” to please someone else or because you idolized “that” in some other person you wanted to be like. Maybe you became “that” out of desperation to get attention, love or to become someone’s friend.
Once you have ascertained the reason(s) for becoming “that,” ask yourself, “Does this way of being match my present-time understanding of how I’d like my life to be? Will it assist me in building a strong foundation for my life’s work? Does it make me happy? Does it bring joy into my life? Does it come from a place of integrity? Does it help to make this world a better place?” I call this process “un-doing” that which no longer serves you.
If the answer to any of those questions is “no,” then your work is not complete. Now it’s time to ask questions of yourself like, “What can I do to change “that?” What does my heart really say? Do I need to get professional help or can I figure this one out on my own?” This is where you begin to fill up the space that was created by the un-doing process. It’s important to replace “that” with only positive, supportive things that help you to become a wonderful person to spend time with. And remember, if you love and respect yourself, others will do the same. Enjoy the process!